Lair of Flying Green Song Rabbits

Listening to: Love After Love - DBSK
Reading: Goong (manhwa) - Park So Hee
Current obsession (changed from want): Red things...like that $75-on-sale-Australian-designer skirt I saw at Paddington markets... D:


I've been obsessively reading Goong (aka Princess Hours) for the past 2 days. It's such a classic romance story and I just love how the characters are so gorgeous, but the emotions so raw despite the fact it's a manhwa. There was just this one thing that kept annoying me, that kept confronting me and giving me the strictest glares of accused hypocricy. I was pissed off at both Chaegyeong and Shin for not ignoring outside influences and just have everything out in the open, which they eventually did but it was already too late. Now I have to wait for the next chapter to come out online to see what happens!

Yes I've watched the series and I know what happens. But the manga seems to follow a more complex and emo plot that I'm starting to doubt the series producers.

It is...so hard.

So hard.

You can't just overcome pride so easily, when you've built the remnants of your self-esteem on the foundations of pride. You can not risk the crumbling of your self pillar of strength, and reduce your own self to hysterical sobbing and suicide. I'm not that masochistic.

I am sorry. I can't stop reading this. I don't understand why these characters are not malicious enough to each other. It's so unrealistic. Continually hurting and wounding your feelings and ego would drive anyone insane with anger and vengeance. The pangs of love are strong enough, but I think Yul and his mother lack maleficence. I wonder if I spelt that word right.

And the whole hot/cold relationship the royal couple have - JUST SOLVE THIS SHIT AND HAVE SEX ALREADY. I'd never have wanted it in the series, but sleeping together seems right in the manga. Oh how I have been brainwashed by fandom. But then I look at my own life, and my own past mistakes, and see that I am exactly like the very thing I hate.

I forgave myself for what I did to T. Now that I remember it, I shouldn't have, neither do I deserve, to be forgiven. I got over it, but in actual fact I probably deserved to rot in my tears. The fact that I forgave myself; it is no wonder I didn't cry when I threw him away like he wasn't worth it. I became too conceited. I became too showered with affection.

I used to guilt myself to tears if I had hurt anyone emotionally.

I barely shed anything over he, who I had fucking loved so desperately, and in turn was so desperate for his display of affection, when I disposed of him. I must have exhausted my eyes previously until I had become this egotistical rock obsessed with selfish ambition (read: excuses). I am so much like Chaegyeong, yet so different. I am not cute, naive nor glowing with warmth and sweetness.

How dare he tell me in that excited tone that he was not going to see or speak to me for 3 weeks. But alas, he does not know how I feel for I am a bloody coward, so it is actually my fault for still not confirming feelings. My emotional capacity has long passed its limits. I no longer unleash sadness and pain that comes from guilt except when watching/reading dramas. I truly am an adult shell.

Gone are the days of innocent, unreasonable and immature adolescence.

Goodbye, cruel fantasy.

No, really. I think I just need a guy to lean on and adore me. Midori makes me jealous. Sometimes.



I drank so much alcohol and liquids that I vomited during ski trip. I do not think it was because of depression. I just wanted to try new things. Do not worry for me Reila, I am fine. My menstrual cycle will most likely unleash its ultimate fury on me next month though, because of it :)

N wasn't even concerned at all at the fact I puked myself senseless. I fell for a big-headed bastard. I blame his charismatic charm.

Sigh. I'll just continue to pretty myself up with nice clothes. I undid and shortened my useless-but-now-useful white men's tie so that I can wear it properly. I feel so proud. I'm so excited for Thursday semi-finals, Reila and co.'s party and Red Tree concert!


I bought the racer red Country Road bag I've been eyeing for ages. I am very satisfied. I want to buy heaps and heaps of antique brooches to clip on to my clothes and bags!

To answer B's post: I chose academics over relationship. And I have regretted it. Mostly because I got a shit mark anyway because I was so distracted at having just ousted someone so important to me.

~~~

Yours forever in cyberspace,

` Serena